Drivers’ attempts to ward off road rage range from blowing kisses to trying to bring in the army, according to a survey.
Some drivers laugh off aggressive behaviour from other motorists while others swear or shout back, the poll by webuyanycar.com found.
One motorist admitted driving to a nearby barracks and asking soldiers to intervene in a road rage incident.
Another woke his sleeping dog to scare off the approaching angry driver.
The poll of 3,000 car owners showed that drivers not indicating and tailgating were the biggest bugbears to road users.
These were followed by talking on mobile phones, slow drivers, traffic jams and drivers not paying attention.
More than half (56%) of motorists got annoyed by back-seat drivers, while 53% said hot weather made them irritable at the wheel.
As many as 63% said they felt anxious driving in city centres and on motorways.
Wales appeared to have the angriest drivers, while the region with the best-behaved motorists was south-west England.